I. Am. Tired.

Have I mentioned lately how tired parenting makes me? We just got home from taking the kids to the library, and stopping at McD's on the way home since it was getting late. I had somewhat of an ulterior motive though... I wanted to take out some parenting books to help give some guidance with Sienna. Man, does she wear us out.

Sienna is such a challenge -- she's so adorable and cuddly/lovable, but she's also such a handful and already a discipline challenge. She's very verbal and has been having tantrums since she was about 13 months old, but now she's becoming a force to be reckoned with. I always thought tantrums had to do with frustration over NOT being able to speak, but it seems like the more verbal Sienna becomes the more difficult her behavior is. Even the phrases she chooses to use can be fairly fresh...if that's possible at 20 months old?

Tonight, we were coming home from the library and I had to reach back to give Lyla her paci. I undid my seat belt and reached back, and Sienna looked at me and yelled "SIT DOWN! Sit down, Mommy!" I asked her the other day if she could help pick up toys, and she said, "Maybeeee...." as if to say, "maybe, maybe NOT!" Then, I had her sitting at the counter to eat lunch and she yelled "RIGHT NOW!" out of the blue. I asked her what she wanted right now, and she said "I want more grapes. RIGHT NOW!" I swear, I do not think she is getting this from us -- but it gives me such a guilt complex thinking that we're teaching her bad stuff already!

She's also very independent. You can hardly do anything for her; she'll say "I do it. Do it MYSELF." about pretty much everything, from feeding to reading a book. She's the one who will take off her own diaper and get into the poop if you don't get her a new diaper quick enough (eww, just had another smearing incident yesterday); she's the one who will look at you and giggle menacingly when you tell her to do something, then do exactly the opposite; but yet she is the one who will be the first to yell "TIME OUT!" when Madelyn does something wrong -- so she clearly gets the idea of discipline.

At the same time, she is so sweet. She always, always says "please" and "thank you" for everything, and she says "excuse me" and "bless you" after sneezes. She never goes to bed without asking for one more hug. She never lets anyone leave the house without asking them for a hug, either. She says "I wuv you" regularly and just makes your heart melt.

So I'm hoping these toddler discipline books will help shed some light. Maybe we're just approaching it all wrong. I know it's easy to have selective memory, but I can say with absolute certainty that by this age, Maddie was listening and following directions a lot more than Sienna is. I know Sienna gets it -- because she acknowledges you and does just the opposite -- but she just isn't interested in following directions when it's not something she wants to do. And I'm not even getting into the tantrums, which are just world class.

I better get reading so we can save a little bit of sanity for when Lyla hits the toddler years...